Heart To Heart

Just want to check in and report that orange spray tan DOES EVENTUALLY fade.  When last we 'talked', I had just tried my first spray tan because my whiteness can be scary on many levels.  Okay - my first premise might be a bit imaginary but - I think cellulite looks better with a tan on it.  There.  I said it. The orange glow was only present on my hands and feet - the rest of me was reasonable.  I scrubbed my hands in a variety of creative ways to some success of fade.  But, my feet....oh my feet.  After our flight landed in Maui I took off my shoes, whipped out my flip flops from my backpack, and rolled up my pants that can magically turn into capris.  Oh my stars.  I discovered there is an advantage to fog.  My feet looked orange in GP, but in the Hawaiian sun light they looked just crazy.  Dennis' parting comment (in between laughing episodes) was to point out the stripes (which were below the leopard-like spots on the back of...

There are many things in life that don't go the way the directions suggest they will. In preparation for a break time we are looking forward to, I decided to try spray tanning.  The white of my legs could scare small children and it seemed like an easy fix.  A fix that lots of people take advantage of.  You know, all those Olympic ice skaters and such.  I can do this. I didn't want to have a real person.....spray me.  Somehow asking them to close their eyes didn't seem wise.  So the answer was this automated spraying deal.  It talks to you from the moment you step in the room.  Let me describe how this goes down... You are directed to put protective lotion on your hands and feet - which I did liberally.  Then you step into the time travel machine and wave your hand to indicate to the machine that you are ready.  There are numbers on the floor.  You can see those numbers clearly when the time machine isn't filled with fog but o...