Friday, July 6, 2012

I need to fix it...

"I want to fix SOMETHING!"  - I heard myself saying to the doctor yesterday.  I was hovering over his shoulder as he entered data into the medical report of the office visit we were having.  My dad was sitting in a wheelchair (very new to him), not really able to participate in the discussion.  I had my notes in front of me - my questions - my suggestions.  Calmly, our doctor answered questions, but mainly just looked at me - which led to my declaration...." I want, I NEED to fix something.  Please help me.  Please..."

But, I can't.  I can't fix this.  I can't make it easier for them (my dad and my mom).  I can honor and be diligent, I can care, but I cannot fix this.  And God, who is the maker of my heart & made me this tender on purpose, hears.

 And it's so good that He hears, but more than being heard - we need to...hear.  There really is something that can only happen when God speaks.

In Genesis, He made light and land and universe -  by sweating?  No, by speaking.  When God speaks, something happens.

So, LORD, speak into the void of my heart and my wisdom and my strength and yes, my emotions.  In the beginning, You did spectacular things in the middle of deep darkness.  Please do the same in me - in this situation.

I'm sure I am standing with other brothers and sisters who are walking through hard days - and we say, "Speak, LORD, your servant is listening."

(Meditate on scripture that describes God speaking. Start with Genesis 1.)

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