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Showing posts from 2013

LOOK...

Revelation 21-22 21  I looked again and could hardly believe my eyes. Everything above me was new. Everything below me was new. Everything around me was new because the heaven and earth that had been passed away, and the sea was gone, completely.  2  And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, descending out of heaven from God, prepared like a bride on her wedding day, adorned for her husband and for His eyes only.  3  And I heard a great voice, coming from the throne. A Voice:  See, the home of God is with His people. He will live among them; They will be His people, And God Himself will be with them. 4    The prophecies are fulfilled: He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; Mourning no more, crying no more, pain no more, For the first things have gone away…. This is what I read this morning  -          I woke up              I opened the Word to where I'm currently reading                    And I got to read t

Quiet but smiling...

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(Sharing this pic because it shows some things that make me smile!) Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)  ”Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” My heart is quiet these days.   My Christmas decorations are subtle. My creativity with words and gifts - limited. {This from the person who at one time led the charge for a Christmas light display that encompassed our whole church campus!} I actually started crying in Staples this week because it reminded me that I wouldn't be doing a Christmas letter for my parents this year.  What's up with that? But - quiet and limited and subtle aren't bad.   It's a time to listen. It's a chance to

My Cracks ...

I have a friend who described to us what she 'saw' during worship at the church a couple of weeks ago... The picture was one of a cracked vase - and as she watched, the cracks were filled up with gold - making a breath-takingly beautiful pattern. She was so humble, and so excited as she shared this picture. In the past, I have been astounded at the fact that our Father would take broken pieces and heal them - making beauty, AND actually making the cracked places stronger (not more vulnerable) than the rest because of His touch. Now I add this new element.  His Super Glue is like gold, and the pattern of our brokenness is a beautiful pattern. Wow. 2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

A beautiful, cracked container...

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV I LOVED being at our home church yesterday.  I had missed the Sunday before, so that leaves a hole in my heart for our church family. The worship team helped me RUN into the embrace of Jesus.  The missionaries expanded my heart by their vision - helping the deaf and hard of hearing in China - water filters supplied in one country - a surgical suite installed in another - nurses going to volunteer to provide medical care for children in yet another - familiar faces from our church family getting ready to go back to Cambodia.  Expanding the tent stakes - expanding our hearts... But, one thing still sounds loud in my heart.  Someone described a picture they were seeing during worship of all kinds of containers with cracks and holes in them.  Those cont

CRAZY-GOOD!

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This weekend we celebrated Dennis' dad's 80th birthday.   He wanted a family party, so that's what he got!   Four generations of fun. Absolutely crazy-loud, crazy-messy, crazy-laughter, crazy-hugging with occasional outbursts from the  I-don't-want-to-share moments.  And that was just great-grandpa!  (Just kidding...)   Five kids -  6 years old and under will provide lots of opportunities to 'make good choices'! Also, this weekend, I was a part of a worship leaders conference.  The first session centered around the unity theme.  Yesterday, my thoughts of the Kingdom - and our family - collided.  All different ages, all different levels of maturity and personality and style and income and places in the journey.  All being together on purpose. If I LOVE the fact that our family makes sacrifices to be together - to honor - to respect - to love - to serve - to ENJOY each other,  how much more must God LOVE when His family chooses to do the same?

Singggging in the rain....

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God has said, "Hold up your cup and I will fill it with My rain." So simple. So hard. I want the cup to be filled up faster than rain - I want a hose. Please, Father? I've longed, for too long, to be 'right enough'...  "Right" enough for my parents. "Right" enough for my family." "Right" enough for people. "Right" enough for God. I'm even trying really hard to be 'right' about where the rain is so I'm holding my cup up in the right place.  I am worshiping enough?  Praying enough?  Listening enough?  Longing enough? Growing up I heard people say something like, "Stand under the spout where the Glory comes out!" Where's the dang spout???? I'm doing 5 Bible studies (or classes) right now - surely the rain is in there somewhere? I want to do things right.  I want to be right . God doesn't seem impressed. He says, "Let go.  You have never, are not - a

Moments

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We went on a road trip....with a portion of the trip planned with reservations and everything...the rest - - - under the "let's just see what happens' category.  If you know Dennis at all, you know that he is a planner.  He likes order.  He REALLY likes order.  And, yes, there were a few messy moments. I had plans.  I anticipated deep (physical, emotional, spiritual, mental) rest, and lots of fun, and incredible clarity from God, and a significant move forward in processing my own grief and the grief of other people that I carry.  That was my plan.  I wasn't asking for  much.  :-)  And, yes, I will not be giving up my day job to be a travel agent. What we DID experience were giant moments of joy.  The kind of joy that makes your heart feel like it's swelling. I wanted to show you a video of Dennis dancing with Tilly, but I couldn't make it work so you'll have to picture that in your mind's eye.  So fun. Then there was the day in Glacier Bay.  

When the smoke clears.....

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We've had major forrest fires in So Oregon.  Most caused by lightning strikes.  The smoke is not expected to clear for weeks as it looks now.  What WILL it look like - when the smoke clears? Have you ever been in a season where you knew that God was working deep, and strong inside the core of who you are - but you can't really see what He's up to?   You just know that something is happening...   You are aware of the circumstances that are providing this opportunity of change... You know that it's in His control, not yours... In the past you've even prayed that He would clean away the stuff that keeps His image from being seen clearly in your life.... Holy fire... The Native Americans used to set fires on purpose to burn away low growth and slash, that if allowed to stay in the forest would be fuel that would eventually cause extreme damage to the forrest. That forrest management style meant that trees grew tall and strong with deep

Yep, I smell.

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I smell. (Just using this picture because I like it and I think it would be a weird job to have!) Today I smell like menthol.  Not the cigarette kind - the clear your sinuses kind.  The smell that reminds me of my grandpa - who died when I was in grade school - but had (I think they called it) rheumatism.  Not really sure what they'd call it now but evidently he found something that brought him pain relief....the smell of which has stayed firmly planted in my brain.  And today I smell like him. It seems my body reacts to stress.  Things seem to blow up, shut down, flow too freely or freak out with pain at various times - in my body - in reaction to walking out this end-of-life-on-this-earth journey with my parents. Today's goal was to be able to sit or lay down without pain. It's not hugely convenient to have to stand 24/7, and I've waited for the last 'blow-up' to calm itself down, but after 4 weeks it seems that I needed help. After a session of

Change...again

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Change. I think the fact the life changes all the time is just weird. Tomorrow we are having a yard sale - an event that just doesn't happen very often with me - I'm not a good negotiator.   I want people to just see the worth and enjoy the bargain!   The uniqueness of tomorrow's sale is that we are selling things that my parents had in their home. - for a quarter, a dollar, five dollars, thirty five dollars, fifty dollars.  I've moved them 3 times - each time to a smaller location - so each time there was pondering and decisions about what to keep and what to give away...and this time we are doing an 'estate' sale - final sale.  How crazy that our 'things' can be reduced to a yard sale. Yes, we've kept things of sentimental value - but there just hasn't been a lot of financial wealth in our family.  How really lovely that they were rich in eternal stuff! Today I said good-bye to my sister.  We have both always lived on the west coast b

Performance...loved/unloved...grace....

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Ruth's Poem

We were in Colorado this week to be together with a group of friends that we have met with on a regular basis for the last 21 years.  Initially when we started this, it was for a couple of specific reasons. Accountability - we had seen too many ministers become casualties and didn't want to walk this journey alone. Growth - we wanted to learn.  Dick and Ruth Foth agreed to meet with us once a year.  Our commitment was 5 years....which has continued for 21 years! This year's time will be unforgetable.  Ruth is a quiet, strong, deep, Godly woman.  Dick is the teacher, the story teller,  the traveller.    We spend this time together sharing, talking, praying - which we were doing on Tuesday morning.  Ruth "leaned in" to look me in the eye and share the following.... " Dear Child, God does not say today, 'Be strong.' He knows your strength is spent; He knows how long  The road has been, how weary you have grown. For He who walked the

Upended?

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"Cast your cares on the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall." Psalm 5:22 Here's an excerpt from C.H. Spurgeon's devotional book, "Morning and Evening:  Daily Readings" . . .  Care, even though exercised upon legitimate objects, if carried to excess, has in it the nature of sin.  The precept to avoid anxious care  is earnestly inculcated by our Saviour, again and again...the very essence of anxious care  is the imagining that we are wiser than God, and the thrusting ourselves into His place to do for Him that which He has undertaken to for us. We attempt to think of that which we fancy He will forget; we labour to take upon ourselves our weary burden , as if He were unable or unwilling to take it for us. ... Anxious care  often leads to acts of sin.  He who cannot calmly leave his affairs in God's hand, but will carry his own burden, is very likely to be tempted to use wrong means to help himself..

Keep Calm and Eat Donuts...

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What a weird, whacky season this has been.   I'm sorry - it's just been a ... messy .... season. Finding moments of joy in a season of sorrow.   Wanting to GIVE joy and comfort when my storehouse of joy and comfort feels dry. Loving the gentleness of Jesus at the same time as having (what feels like) an open wound on my heart. When my dad died a few months ago, I gained 20 pounds.  They weren't fun moments of comfort food pounds.  They were middle-age, stress-reaction, not-really-eating,  bummed-from-watching-my dad in pain pounds. I have evidently proudly embraced those pounds through the passing of my mom a couple of weeks ago.  This time I figured I'd add a few donuts to my moments so there would be a fun reason to look like I did when I was pregnant 30 years ago! I think a donut is better to eat than a piece of cake - it has a big hole in the middle of it, for goodness sake.  It's almost a diet food.  Logically, eating donut holes are al

Yes, I steam-cleaned my face...

Tonight seemed like a good night to check in - blogging style.  I'm in an interesting place in the journey.  I want to be encouraging and honoring and fun and a few other things....but....it seems easier to express what I am not. This week I am reminded that I am not a good cook.  Last night, Dennis asked me why my face was red and glowing.  The reason - I snuck a peek at some potatoes roasting in a 450* oven and evidently the steam from that hot of an oven can burn your face.  In my case, my nose proceeds my other facial features so much that it attracted most of the action.  I would not recommend steam-cleaning your face. Tonight, all I have to say is...there is a big difference (evidently) between 3 tablespoons of flour, and 2 teaspoons of flour when you are making a sauce.  My eyes simply skipped a line on the recipe list of ingredients - I missed one stinkin' line - and magically I have now made some sort of instant paste instead of sauce.  Dennis, once again, was incr

He will refresh and restore...

"Be on guard against the pit of self-pity.  When you are weary or unwell, this demonic trap is the greatest danger you face.  Don't even go near the edge of the pit.  Its edges crumble easily, and before you know it, you are on the way down.  It is ... harder to get out of the pit than to keep a safe distance from it..."   part of February 23 daily devotion from JESUS CALLING (by Sarah Young) Do I dare confess to you my weariness?  Can I say out loud that watching my mom's misery every day is flat out kicking my....behind?  Does it REALLY encourage anyone to know that they are not alone in the decision to FIX their eyes on Jesus, the Author and the Finisher of our faith - no matter what they are walking through?  To be okay with praise and prayers that aren't perfect, but are the best we have to offer in the moment?  To be reminded that He hears our prayers and keeps our tears.  To want to hear His voice above every other voice.  His voice is what keeps me fro

My name is Jeanette Webber, and I have been involved in an IPad accident...

Psalm 139:13-14  “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well” I happen to be one of those people who need to be reminded that I am made the way I am, on purpose - for a purpose.   Last night I dropped my IPad on my foot - the corner of it shot like an arrow and hit like my foot had a target painted on it.  I had just taken a bath with nice, clear (not orange like the last 2 years) water from our new water heater.  I tried REALLY, REALLY hard to not drop my IPad in the water, cuz that would have been dorky.  Evidently I should have been REALLY, REALLY careful AFTER water was no longer involved.  It appears that an IPad can also be used as a weapon.   "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made..." This last Sunday I forgot Moses' name.  Really?   In the middle of a time of moving mountains in praise, I can'

Life is Not A Drive Through...

Sunday, as I was leading worship there was a definite time when I felt we were waiting for something.  What are we waiting for, Lord?  It's interesting to be the leader when your leading a time of....waiting.  Waiting is not a comfortable time for most people.  (I'm grateful for a church family that is willing to wait in the Presence of God.)  Most of us like quick service, done in a way that pleases us the most. When I was pregnant with Andrew, I learned a huge lesson in waiting.   Andrew was "due" December 1st and was born December 27th.  Since Jeremy (our first born) was 2 day's early,  I thought I knew how to do the birth thing.  Sometimes your past experience does not determine your present experience!   It was such a long wait. Now, I'm waiting on the Home-going of my mom.  A couple of years ago it seemed that the Lord reminded me of my birth coachng days.  It seemed that I was going to be a coach for my parents' birthing into heaven.  I know - s